The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes

The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes

With Father’s Day just around the corner, the dad jokes will be coming in thick and fast. Here’s 20 of the corniest, punniest or just downright daggy dad jokes we’ve come across. And let us know your best dad joke in the comments below to win an awesome Father’s Day prize pack from LEDLENSER and Leatherman! 

 

Where do the tomato and lettuce hang out on Saturday nights?
Club Sandwich.

Scientists say that ants are immune to the Corona virus.
It's thanks to their antibodies.

I bought a wig today for only one dollar.
It was a small price toupee.

What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts?
A barberqueue.

Did you hear about the man doing tap dancing?
He fell into sink and broke his ankle!

I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, and then it hit me.

I was washing the car with my son yesterday. He didn't like it - he said “Dad, why can’t you just use a sponge?”

What is the best time to make an appointment with the Dentist?
Tooth hurty.

I have written a book on how to fall down the stairs. It's a step by step guide.

Dad, can you explain solar eclipse? No son.

Where does a pirate find his buccaneers?
On his buccanhead.

My mate has become really lazy since he lost his job as a cricket umpire, now he wont even lift a finger.

I think my new dog is a blacksmith, as soon as I got him home, he made a bolt for the door

Why did the golfer where two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.

I just got back from a job interview where they asked if I could perform under pressure. I said I wasn’t too sure about that but I could do a wicked “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

Why were the athletes at the Tokyo Olympics always sweating?
Because there were no fans allowed.

Why have the baked beans moved to Queensland?
Because they like to live in Cairns.

Where does Napoleon place his armies?
In his sleevies.

Did you hear about the drummer who had twin daughters?
He named them Anna One, Anna Two.

Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.

 

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